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Just Another Day in a Competitive Marriage

November 21, 2009

Today’s goofy conversation went a little something like this:

The Big Nugget (BN): Eels have a new album coming out

Me: When

BN: January 19

Me: Perfect timing (Eels have a very very very sad sound & style…but I still love them). I haven’t seen anything from them for awhile.

BN: Not since the one you bought a few months ago.

Me: I did not.

BN: Yes you did.

Me: What’s it called? What does it look like?

BN turns his laptop toward me, showing me the album cover.

Me: I have never seen that before.

BN: Yes you have. You bought it.

Me: Did not.

BN: You own it.

Me: I know nothing about this. When did I buy it? Where did I buy it?

BN: You own it.

Me: Oh. I get it. You’re telling me that I already own it so that I won’t go out and buy it.

BN: No I’m not. You already bought it.

Me: Did I buy it on iTunes?

BN: You bought the CD.

Me: I did not. Prove it to me.

BN: I don’t know where it is. You own it. You put it somewhere.

Me: Did I buy it and you took it from me so that I never got to listen to it, thereby not implanting that I own it?

BN: I don’t know what in the hell you did with it. You own it.

Me: Do not. (And then I went to the bathroom. When I came back out, it was sitting on the kitchen island).

BN: It was in the glove compartment.

Me: See! I told you, you took it from me.

BN: Your glove compartment!

Me: From a time when you drove my car!

BN: You are really annoying.

Me: I don’t understand. I can’t recall buying this. Where was I? Who was I with? What day was it?

BN: This is just the beginning of how your life is going to be from now on.

Me: Are you messing with me? Aren’t you supposed to be going somewhere? I thought you had some thing that started at 9.

BN: It starts at 10, but there’s a breakfast at 9.

Me: Does your girlfriend know that you mess with me like this?

BN: My calendar is sitting on my desk.

Me: The calendar you and your girlfriend made up to throw me off. Make me think that I’m going insane.

BN: You are really annoying.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. November 21, 2009 11:43 am

    How difficult would it be for you to pay back in kind? After all, men do start to lose their memories before women do.

  2. capitolady permalink
    November 24, 2009 9:06 pm

    OMG you are so funny. This sounds like something hubby and I debate daily. But alas I am the one who can’t find the remote that is 4 inches from my hand. 🙂

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