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The Lump: Part 4

January 19, 2010

I can’t express enough how much your shared stories soothe me. Thank you!

Won’t it be nice when this cyst is just that, a cyst with a tiny benign hat, so that I can go back to non-lump entries?

I woke up at 4 in the damn morning, worrying that the clinic I was referred to wouldn’t be in my insurance’s network. I forgot to ask. Thankfully, after a search today, it is in my insurance’s network. I had a good second choice but I really wanted to go where the new clinic sent me because I am in love with the new clinic and also, I once (1981) had a telephone conversation with the man who donated the money to start the clinic I was referred to. I figured it was a sign.

That makes all kinds of sense to me.

So today I went to school and blurted out in a class that I had a lump in my breast. The poor teacher, she asked how our long weekend was, so I told her. But it’s all good because this was a class with My People and I need My People to know what’s going on because just like you guys (I heart you guys), you keep my tiny-benign-hatted cyst from killing me. As my brain would do if I let it run wild. I try not to let my brain run wild too often. It’s dangerous!

My school people are good for me, too. They don’t have the detailed boob lumpage that you guys have (lordy, we are a full life raft, aren’t we?) but they let me spew it, got mad about it, and then we got some lunch and went back to school work.

My boob  hurts today like somebody punched it in the face. Over and over again. It’s nice to have a break before it gets the shit kicked out of it again, next Monday.

Stupid boob.

I need to go nap, now.

Oh! But tomorrow?! I pick up my CPAP – and I expect great things from it. Great things!

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12 Comments leave one →
  1. January 19, 2010 6:19 pm

    My sister started using her CPAP last week and is very happy with it.

  2. poolagirl permalink
    January 19, 2010 8:22 pm

    Sorry I have been absent here. Much going on and I haven’t been doing my thing with other journals. I know you are going to be just fine. I am holding you in my heart.

  3. January 19, 2010 9:25 pm

    My Hub uses a C-pap – has for years and it has changed his life SO much for the better…and it really didn’t take him long to get used to it!

  4. January 19, 2010 10:41 pm

    Damn, girl! I hate my boobs too – and they scare the heck outta me. My friend has the boob cancer and I’ve been afraid to even look at mine crosseyed since she told me about it. Now, your boobs are acting squirrley – My boobs are hurting now in sympathy. (I think it’s a good thing if they hurt. Yours. Not mine.)

    Anyway – as my departed mother would say to me – “It’s probably just gas, dear”. So, breathe. Everything will be okay.

  5. January 20, 2010 8:15 am

    My sweet Kitch! I miss a couple of days and all hell breaks loose in your boobage area! I’m not going to tell you to stay calm and zen. You wouldn’t do that anyway. I will tell you that I went through a similar incident a few years ago. My GP (who has been checking out my boobage for almost 13 years) discovered a lump on my breast. She was concerned enough to call the Mammo Clinic and convince them to get me in that day. Everything went well. It was a cyst. In fact it ended up being so much nothing that I can’t even remember which breast it was. But, I do remember the hot flashes of fear and dread that I lived with waiting for the results. {{HUGS}}

  6. capitolady permalink
    January 21, 2010 10:57 am

    omg I am so sorry I haven’t had a minute to read your blog! How horrid. I hope it helps that last november they said they found something on my mammo and it turned out to be nothing more than a cyst after a I had a major freak out. I will pray for you dear friend.

  7. yaketyyak permalink
    January 24, 2010 8:12 am

    I had a similar scare several years ago when I found a lump in my left breast. Needle biopsy was unsuccessful, so I had to go for surgical removal and biopsy. After the surgery, the surgeon told me that she has done countless lump removals/biopsies, and knows malignant cells when she sees them. Or, at least she thought she did. In other words, she would have sworn that my lump was malignant, based on the cell structure. So, she decided to send a slice for frozen sample biopsy (which is immediate), and leave me under anesthetic so she could do what she had to do when the results came back and confirmed her malignant diagnosis. Much to her surprise (and my relief, upon hearing this story), the results came back benign. I hope the same will be true for you.

    • January 24, 2010 12:01 pm

      You are why a person needs to write about such hateful things – You took me a step farther down the what if road and let me know that if I have to go that far, I’ll still be okay.

      Love you Stephanie!

      Kathy

    • January 24, 2010 12:02 pm

      In case my e-mail reply didn’t get to you Stephanie, I wrote:

      You are why a person needs to write about such hateful things – You took me a step farther down the what if road and let me know that if I have to go that far, I’ll still be okay.

      Love you Stephanie!

  8. yaketyyak permalink
    January 25, 2010 5:07 pm

    Love you, too, Kathy! And you WILL be okay!

  9. yaketyyak permalink
    January 25, 2010 5:09 pm

    P.S. I haven’t checked my email today, so I’m glad I checked back here!

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