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Breasts, On Ice!

January 28, 2010

Next Wednesday a very nice surgeon will be taking my breasts away. And for this, I am thankful.

I know. I’m about the biggest lunatic in the world. But really, I don’t want them. They have caused me nothing but trouble. buh-bye boobies.

Besides, the surgeon was going to have to remove the lumps and surrounding tissue and lymph node, and possibly more, which is about the size of an egg; meaning I’d have to have reconstructive surgery for sure. And I’m just not sure I want reconstructive surgery so I offered them both for her removal.

I don’t want implants. I might eventually want my belly fat moved to my breastal area (I’m so glad I took that medical terminology class so I could have medical words like “breastal” in my vocabulary…hi Susan! You are a great medical terminology teacher!) I can have that done at any time, later. It involves using fat and muscle and I did not want to recover from abdominal surgery at the same time I’m recovering from boob-removal surgery. Again – thank you Susan!

I do  believe that it will be very healthy for me to make sure that I have ample amounts of belly fat so that I am always prepared for the day I want reconstructive breast surgery.

Get in mah belly!

We won’t know what stage of cancer I have until lymph nodes have been looked at, after surgery. Unless the lymph nodes have very bad things to say (I have talking lymph nodes!) my prognosis is good. I will be going through chemo and possibly radiation. But we won’t know about the radiation until we’ve made the fat lymph nodes sing (they sing, too! I hope they perform well on ice! AND IN THE METRODOME ON SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY!!!!!)

Seriously. I am the goofiest person cancer has ever confronted. Good luck, cancer. I will use my ridiculousness to defeat you!!!

I am Her2 negative. Which means that when Harry Connick Jr. played the Her2 cancer fighting drug inventor, Dr. Denny Slamon, in the movie “Living Proof”,   he was not acting for me.

I still like Harry Connick though.

I don’t know what that all means. I just know it means nothing to me but that people have asked “Are you Her2 positive?” No. I am not.

That’s about that for now. I have a wealth of knowledge rattling around in my head and perhaps it may all stop for a bit so I can make sense of it all.

I do know that the cancer clinic I am going to is great with hand holding and brain de-rattling, any time I need it. Until they can’t take any more of me, change their name, move from their current location, and leave no forwarding number.

My gut is not a mess. I have moments of crying but mostly I have moments of everything’s going to be okay – once the vomiting stops (I have already declared copious amounts of vomit on the horizon and I haven’t even met my oncologist yet) I’ll be ready to get this crap behind me.

You people and your comments and e-mails are awesome! I have laughed out loud and I have been thankful, so very thankful with all your support and advice and forced huggery.

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21 Comments leave one →
  1. January 28, 2010 3:57 pm

    i propose that we all do a self breast exam at the exact time of your surgery, as a group-feel tribute to you and a promise to ourselves not to neglect the girls.

    there is an upside to all this- you get to pick out your next set of ta-tas! do you think you will go really big, kinds like anna nicole smith’s before the trimspa, or maybe a pair like pamela anderson 20 years ago? that’s something to think about and plan!

  2. akkelly permalink
    January 28, 2010 4:10 pm

    Bye-Bye cancerous boobies! Don’t leave any of your friends behind on your way out!

  3. January 28, 2010 4:48 pm

    Next Wednesday. I’ll have to put the group feel on my calendar, and hope that nobody at school notices.

  4. January 28, 2010 4:52 pm

    If this helps at all, you have made me more diligent about doing self exams. Thank you.

  5. Gretchen permalink
    January 28, 2010 4:52 pm

    Wow, that is fast on the surgery! I guess the best defense is a good offense. Or did I get that backwards? Anyway, it sounds like you’ve got a good team to work with and that will mean a lot.

  6. January 28, 2010 5:20 pm

    I think you are making the right decision. My sister did that too, and she was relieved to know she would never have breastal (neener) issues again.. plus, no more mammograms! Let me know if you need anything tasty to eat!

  7. January 28, 2010 5:43 pm

    I am so glad they are moving quickly on this. Kathy you have really inspired me. The moment I read your journal entry I called my GYN and asked her to schedule me for an mammogram as I am 6 months over due. When the nurse asked if anything was the matter I burst into tears and didn’t know what to say. She wouldn’t get that there are a group of us who have been reading each others words for ten years now and we happen to care about each other very much. I just blathered about a friend and cancer and being scared and worried and so she fit me in today at 6: 00 PM my time.

    So I am getting squished today.

    Thinking of you as always xo

  8. January 28, 2010 5:46 pm

    ps – Her2 negative is a very good thing.

  9. January 28, 2010 6:34 pm

    I have always said if I get a DOT of cancer in my boobs to take everything and anything out of my body, all nodes, tissue, you name it. Think of the savings on bras right?
    I am so sorry you are going through this and love ya to pieces girlfriend! I know so many wonderful happy ending successful breast cancer stories if you ever need em. The best was my cousin, stage 4 and she KICKED THAT CANCERS ASS!!!!!!!!
    I know you will too because you are just that awesome!

  10. January 28, 2010 6:47 pm

    My mom did the same as you. Removed both breasts, get them out and get on with life. She did do reconstruction, but I think those surgeries were harder than the masectomy. She’s doing good now, never had to do radiation, but does have some kind of mild chemo pill she takes everyday. I know you’ll do great, you have a good attitude and I know that that helps!

  11. Paula permalink
    January 28, 2010 6:48 pm

    Well no grass grows under your boobs! I admire your quick action. Also I have penciled in the Group Grope for next Wednesday.

    I have some belly fat to spare if you need any…..

  12. January 28, 2010 7:54 pm

    I, too, have extra belly fat to send, should you need some. And my Group Grope will occur in the courtroom. Just imagine how surprised the judge will be.

  13. Jamie permalink
    January 28, 2010 8:52 pm

    Two rolls worth of belly fat will be ready and waiting to be shipped off to you, just say the word K-Lo…Just say the word. Don’t forget to take time to breath.

    P.S. Can we name this tumah with a hat…so we can will it away by name. You are so good at coming up with awesome names ie. The Big Nugget…

  14. January 28, 2010 9:49 pm

    Keeping you in my prayers. They through so much info at you at first, but eventually your brain lets it all fall into place.

  15. poolagirl permalink
    January 28, 2010 9:53 pm

    You have such an amazing attitude through all of this! I am in awe. You are definitely on the top of my list for heroes right now.

  16. January 28, 2010 9:59 pm

    Well the other Paula beat me to the offer of belly fat. I’ll just have to send you something to help make nice new fresh belly fat for when you are ready for your Belly Boobs. Hugs Kathy!!!!!

  17. January 28, 2010 10:00 pm

    Look, I could give you half of my boobs and we’d still be quite well-endowed. What say you? Want some boobs from some weird chick on the interwebz you’ve never met? Seriously, though, you are an amazing woman to be getting through this so well. It sounds like you’re making the best decision, one that will let you breathe easy once the surgery is over. Still sending you hugs, if you will stand still for them.

  18. lap permalink
    January 28, 2010 10:45 pm

    You know I could knit you some boobs, (there are many many patterns for knitted boobs out there for some reason), but the I thought what would suit your unique sense of style and self much better is if I knitted you a fancy boob scarf. It would be more like a boob boa I think.. Think of the conversations you could have at the grocery store because of an accessory like that!

  19. Katherine permalink
    January 28, 2010 11:32 pm

    You rock. And you’re going to rock even harder with one of those high-fashion flat chests. You know that it’s true. And should the high-fashion look not be for you, I have all the belly fat any pair of boobs could ever need. And it’s yours for the asking. You’re the best, show ’em what you’ve got, and I’ll be praying and storing belly fat should you need me.

  20. yaketyyak permalink
    January 29, 2010 5:39 am

    Yes, Her2 negative IS a good thing. So is using ridiculousness to beat this! 🙂

  21. Ruth from SC permalink
    January 29, 2010 8:50 am

    Hey…I’m a joiner – I’m in for the Group Grope on Wed (Do we know the time?) Also will be setting aside extra belly fat…(I have much to give…) Hang in there Kathy……..Hugs from this psuedo-Southerner!

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