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September 7, 2010

Sometimes I feel so distant from my extended family and sometimes I feel immersed in my extended family. Is that weird?

This was a weekend of extended family immersion, starting with visiting The Big Nugget’s niece’s second-hand children’s clothing store, time at my sister’s cabin – eating this – and now The Big Nugget’s big sister is at our house until she heads back to Honolulu tomorrow.

After tomorrow, I’ll probably have a family break for awhile. Which is fine, I guess. I don’t know. I’m weird. I like the family chaos and noise. Which is the exact opposite of what The Big Nugget wants. Although he always loves it when his big sister is in town. I totally agree. I think she’s awesome and I think she doesn’t come home often enough.

I better figure out what to do with all of this quiet time because I have to tell you people, I am bored out of my mind. I know I told you this before but before the cancer I was going to school full time. Reading textbooks, writing papers, eating turkey burgers in the school’s cafeteria with all of my new friends. And then the stupid cancer came and I had surgery, then chemo, then I watched my hair fall out, then my arm swelled up, and now my hair is taking forever to come back. While I sit around and wait to get better. I can’t go back to school yet – not with scar revision surgery at the end of October – and a 6 week recovery period. I can’t get a job because my resume won’t be complete until I’m done with school. But even if I weren’t waiting to finish my diploma, I couldn’t get a job now because of the surgery and the recovery and the fact that I don’t want to interview while looking like a cancer patient.

I am bored.

Thing 2 is in community college or working. Thing 1 is at his stuff or is now working. His “stuff” ends this week so even my driving him to and fro is cut back to just his work schedule. The Big Nugget is at work and when he’s home, he’s quiet (as always).

I better find something to do before I go insane.

I should probably start walking the dog (who is at this moment making circles of the first floor, anticipating the waking up of The Big Nugget’s big sister).

I should probably start delivering Meals on Wheels again. I wonder if I can get Route #13 back. I can at least do that for the next month and a half.

I should probably go through my closets and get through the clothing that can only be worn with a woman with boobs.

(Seriously! Dog?! Stop with the circling!)

I should probably…

(goddammit dog!)

5 Comments leave one →
  1. September 7, 2010 10:37 am

    Is it possible to get hold of some of the books you’ll need when you go back to school and get ahead on your reading? There are things you can’t do and things you can. If you get some of this out of the way now, so it will be review when it’s assigned, you will have the luxury of being able to concentrate on, say, transcription, when you are physically able to do it.

    I can’t type worth a darn any more. I, who used to do 60 wpm on a manual. TG for computers!

  2. lap permalink
    September 7, 2010 11:58 am

    I’m still looking for the right collaborator for Project Mommylap if you’re interested..

  3. goatbarnwitch permalink
    September 7, 2010 4:09 pm

    Maybe there is another venue to volunteer besides meals on wheels. Hunger is a big issue these days, maybe you could take some of your recipes on the road and help out at a soup kitchen … just a thought. Boredom sucks cuz it feeds on it’s self so breaking the pattern is very very good.

  4. September 7, 2010 10:02 pm

    When I’m busy I crave a day off and when I have the day off I get bored. I think l’empress had a great idea – can you get a book or two to study?

  5. Floweer permalink
    September 8, 2010 10:04 am

    Come bead with me. I will get you a photo of Josh Harnett – not barfing – but groomsmaning. See you later!

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