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AARP Goon Squad

October 2, 2010

I got a telemarketing call this morning, inquiring into my status of diabetes. I informed her that I was not interested in discussing this with her and bid farewell.

Wow. I made that sound like it was the most polite of conversations.

I am suspicious that this is a form of extortion by AARP, who I’ve refused to join since the mailings began near my 50th birthday, a year and a half ago. They got my name from somebody (social security?) and will continue to sell my name until I pay their annual fee and become an official member of the retirement sect.

I won’t do that. I fear that if I do, my next move will be buying bone-colored shoes with velcro closures.

Which reminds me – I bought Fit  Flop sneakers.

They are a hit at this house. Thing 2 thought they were cool and the Big Nugget was looking into his own pair.

I won’t tell them, but I’ll tell you – I bought some Dr. Scholl’s arch supports to slip inside them. But that’s only because I’ve always had a high arch and has nothing to do with the fact that AARP is riding my ass!


I took Stella Mirra, Retrieved Golden, for a walk along the creek yesterday. (Not wearing the new Fit Flop sneakers but wearing the new Orthaheel tennis shoes I’d received earlier in September – that are fantastic, BTW, but lord how I hate dorky looking tennis shoes, which they are) I bought a short leash (It’s about a foot and a half long?) not long ago and it really makes a difference with my puller of a dog. She still pulls but the fact that she’s not 6 feet out gives her less pull. She was actually “normal” when we passed people; didn’t even go bezerk when we saw a squirrel lunch wagon.

We got home and I was feeling really tuckered out (but not old! Don’t call AARP!) and was about to take a nap when there was a loud SNAP and the power went out. Thing 1 said it came from somewhere in a neighbor’s back yard. I’m guessing it was a squirrel vs. electric transformer = both lose.

I went ahead with the nap, what else was I going to do with no power! When I woke up I discovered that my throat was on fire and for the first time since before the dawn of my stupid cancer, I had a cold. Or the flu. Don’t really know the difference since the day I learned that just because it didn’t include vomit, didn’t mean it wasn’t the flu. – as I always thought was the difference. Sick and no vomit? Cold. Sick and vomit? Flu.

So here I am today, with a nasty throat and starting to get stuffy nose.

I blame it on walking the dog. I felt fine before.

BTW – when the power came back on and I turned on the oven so that I could cook a gourmet frozen pizza dinner? The oven element started to spark and flame. Dammit. This happened to our old oven – an oven that came with the house. This is the newer oven – maybe 3 years old? Thankfully we purchase the service plus plan from our utility company who will be out here on Tuesday to fix it – no cost to us other than the monthly expense. We pretty much get our money’s worth on that payment each year between the air conditioner, furnace and now the oven.

And now, my blog reading friends, I am off of the computer to make some book thongs and nap, read and nap, watch t.v. and nap, and nap. But not because I’m old!

5 Comments leave one →
  1. October 2, 2010 12:14 pm

    Watch out for that diabetes group! They’re not from AARP. They started on me earlier this year; don’t forget, I was diagnosed twelve years ago. They start out very supportive, like a medical survey, and I’m often willing to answer questions for that. But when they found out that I am no longer testing every single day, they got argumentative. (See, they’re selling testing supplies.) I told them I didn’t want to talk any more and I hung up.

    They called at least twice more, despite being told to remove my name from their lists. You can’t trust anyone. (I’m even a little leery of AARP myself, and I’ve been a member since…I guess since Husband was old enough to join.)

  2. October 2, 2010 1:02 pm

    Ugh, sorry you’re sick. I’ve always thought that flu involved achy joints and a fever of more than a couple degrees. A cold is just a damn cold, with maybe a little fever. I last had the real flu in 1999, and it was awful, I was in bed for three days and it took me weeks to get over it. I very much hope that you just have a cold, and a mild one at that.

  3. October 4, 2010 8:36 am

    The damned AARP started sending me their “join now” crap last year when I was merely 45 years old and they continue to send it. They can just bite me–I will never have anything to do with them, even if they’d offer me free botox for life.

  4. October 4, 2010 8:41 am

    I get sent AARP stuff all the time, and I’m 36. I also regularly get mailings on hearing aids and electric wheelchairs. My husband finds it hilarious.

  5. October 6, 2010 12:01 pm

    Your utility company offers a service plus plan? I never heard of anything like that! You’d think AARP would mention it in that magazine they send me every month… Hmph.

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